Woke up that afternoon
Crawled out of my bed
Raked a plastic comb
up across my achin' head
Washed my dirty face and
changed my rotten shirt
Noticed I was wearin'
my friend jimmy's miniskirt
(but that's another story)
Put on my jeans
without lookin' down to see
and when I pulled my zipper
my zipper pulled on me
Oh the surprise
Oh the agony
When I pulled on my zipper
my zipper pulled on me
I ran around the shack
lettin' out a frightful roar
Woke up my friend Jimmy
who was sleepin' on the floor
Jimmy stumbled 'round
still drunk from last nights booze
I ranted and I roared
and he looked a bit confused
I begged and whimpered Jimmy
won't you set my willy free
but when he pulled my zipper
my zipper pulled on me
Oh the surprise
Oh the agony
When Jimmy pulled my zipper
my zipper pulled on me
Well that stupid drunken' Jimmy
could be of no use to me
I ran to see the doctor
pleading set my willy free
The doctor was a scholar
and a rabbi in his prime
He told me not to worry
he had done this several times
A couple hours later
I was strollin' down the street
The doctor set my willy free
but sadly incomplete
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